I was created in a debris-strewn alley when an unnamed transient screwed a discarded waffle iron beneath some high-tension wires during a thunderstorm. The motion of his wrinkly member repeatedly penetrating that malfunctioning appliance caused it to short-circuit at the very same moment Jupiter slid into alignment with a fluorescent light globe manufacturing plant in downtown New Jersey, thus tearing a hole in the very fabric of reality and causing an elderly musk rat to violently expel me from its anus in a large cloud of argon gas. In my larval stage I resembled a small elliptical puffer fish with training wheels and I divided my time pretty much equally between foraging for mossy deposits growing on the undercarriage of parked cars and attempting to attack low-flying aircraft. After several years on the street, I was found by a kind-hearted Vietnamese sailor, on shore leave and trawling the back alleys for hookers, and adopted by him shortly thereafter. I spent the next six years sailing around the world on a Vietnamese whaler, earning my keep by eating the barnacles that periodically attached themselves to the hull of the ship, until it was scuttled by a rogue manatee in 1946. After washing ashore in early 1947, I won a scholarship at Cambridge University, where I quickly discovered how to steal paper clips from the faculty supply closet. After graduating, I spent the next decade or so making a fairly decent profit smuggling anencephalic babies into Libya, hidden in Pringles cans secreted deep within the cavernous armpits of my beloved camel, Roseanne. I was going by the name "Aluminum Harry" at the time and my forehand serve was legendary. If I'm not entirely mistaken, I believe it was at some point during this period that I invented chalk. As a highly sought-after and rare delicacy, trading in anencephalous infants was an extremely lucrative source of income for anyone with the fortitude to brave the dangerous border-crossings and inhospitable desert terrain. The Libyan Royalty were especially partial and would pay a handsome price for prime merchandise. Alas, after nearly fifteen years, my illustrious career abruptly came to an end after I insulted the King Of Libya's hairiest (and thus most desirable) daughter by refusing to pelt her unconscious with melons (a local custom I was not aware of). I spent most of the interim years up until this point in a dank Libyan jail cell attempting to train hundreds of cockroaches and gnats to cover my body from head to toe and fly me to freedom through an uncovered ventilation shaft high up in the stone ceiling of my prison. Unfortunately, I succeeded only in contracting Amoebic Dysentery thirty-six times. I eventually managed to make my escape by presenting my jailer with a lovely hand-woven rhinestone-studded silk bra and asking very politely to be released. After the guard covered his eyes and began counting to twenty, I slipped away from the prison compound in the dead of night, now entirely penniless and, wearing only a small radish, set off for my homeland on a conveniently nearby-parked dog sled.

10th February 2014

Photo with 58 notes

I made a thing.
Lace, scavenged bones from an abandoned nature preserve, quartz, rose quartz, and amethyst on a stainless steal collar. 

I made a thing.

Lace, scavenged bones from an abandoned nature preserve, quartz, rose quartz, and amethyst on a stainless steal collar. 

Tagged: ahrtibhajewelrycrystalsbonestaxidermyquartzrose quartzamethystcollarcrochetlacecrochet collarlace collarchokerwire wrapjunkpunkfound objectsupcyclecraftyweirdbone jewelrywitch

22nd June 2012

Photo with 76 notes

Tagged: weirdgothbondageneck corsetmohawkstrangewomansexy

22nd May 2012

Post with 14 notes

Tagged: funny gifgiflolweird

21st March 2012

Photo with 15 notes

Tagged: megpoyweirdgothcybergothgrungealienstangesxswaustinmusicblackjewelryearringmakeup

10th March 2012

Photo

Tagged: gpoymegirlweirdmakeupmake upface offnativealienweirdstrangegothmass effect 3twilekstar warssithi dont fucking knowtags are retarded anyway

9th March 2012

Photo with 4 notes

Tagged: gpoymeweirdalienstrangepicturemakeupmake upcreepymayanapocalyptomass effect 3star warsfifth elementleelooface offshitty camerablurryhipsterscrewgazewitch housewhatever

9th March 2012

Photo with 2 notes

Tagged: gpoymeweirdmakeupmake upface offaliencreationmass effect 3john carterdress upredblackface paint

6th March 2012

Photo with 5 notes

Tagged: creepyweirdaliendemonghostpoltergeistscarymegpoynegativenegatives

2nd February 2012

Photo with 13 notes

Tagged: god still loves usi am legendweirdcreepyartzombie apocalypse

30th January 2012

Photo with 1 note

yeeee

yeeee

Tagged: gpoymegirlmakeupmakeupkabukikabuki theatergeishanohnopperaboubutohshintoweeaboojapananimememoirs of a geishayeeeweird

29th January 2012

Photo with 4 notes

Yes. Blurry. Shit camera. I’m poor. Fuck you.

Yes. Blurry. Shit camera. I’m poor. Fuck you.

Tagged: gpoymemakeupmake upweirdalien.mass effectmass effect 2quariansalarianasaridont ask why i added ME tagsturiandrellstar wars5th elementleeloogirl with the dragon tattooshaved headshavedheadgirlpinkblackfacepaint

1st December 2011

Photo with 4 notes

Tagged: makeupgreenyellowleaopardcheetahspotsweirdgothcyberpunkravebullshitweirdfuck your mother

21st September 2011

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A drawing I did for a friend of mine. Oogly Boogly Goblins and treasure.

A drawing I did for a friend of mine. Oogly Boogly Goblins and treasure.

Tagged: heninoushexdrawingillustrationcartooncharacterspsychobillyrockabillygoblinsgirlssexygothwierdweirdwhatever

19th September 2011

Video with 13 notes

This song, man….

I just found it on the jootubes…..

It’s so…perfect.

Tagged: blumeeinsturzende neubautengermanindustrialweirdwierdfamazingbeautifulecclecticmusicsonevideo

17th August 2011

Photo with 12 notes

The higher the hair, the closer to Valhalla, bitches…

The higher the hair, the closer to Valhalla, bitches…

Tagged: gpoymohawkmegoth.punkweirdcamewhoregirlhotyesiamsexyfuckyou